Misfits
by jensentaylor
Summary: The story is rewritten. Marshall Eriksen death really took a toll on everyone, including Lily. Barney thought it was a good idea to be there for her as a friend, but things started to change when their lips touched. Ted is having a hard time also when it comes to Robin. He wants to love her, but is she even ready to jump right in? It's a Barney/Lily and Ted/Robin love story.
1. Prologue

Marshall died, making everyone's lives a little bit more complicated than before. Lily is grieving. Barney is falling. Ted is not the Ted we all love and adore, and Robin is trying to deal with the fact that maybe she really does have feelings for Ted than she actually thought. Everyone has little problems in their life after the death of one of their friends, who really showed the niceness of the group. What made them so crazy, but yet they are sacrificing a lot of things just to be happy. Everything is AU, and pretty much rewritten Season 6/7/8/9 till whenever i want to stop it.

* * *

Description for barney and lily; Three months after Marshall's death, Barney found himself making out with Lily, thus came the night of November 13th, 2010 where they slept together. Lily felt guilt, while Barney has been developing feelings her. Who knew after Robin he could find happiness once again, but Lily really doesn't know that he has feelings for her. All she thinks that Barney really wants is sex, so she ignores the fact he has legit feelings for her. This is a story how the robot fell in love with the kindergartner teacher, while she did the same.

Description for ted and robin; They've been through way too much with each other. It all started when he saw this girl across the bar, blankly looking back at him. She smiled softly, and carried on with her conversation. It was like one of those movies where you see the girl, and boom, you knew you were going to marry that girl. It didn't really happen towards them. Stubbornness always got them, biting them in the ass. Timing. That was always their enemy in these kind of things, and now, do they have a chance to let the blue french horn rise again, or will it be stained on the wall in that restaurant for an entirety?

* * *

Ships: Barney/Lily, and Ted/Robin

TEMP: Barney/Nora, Barney/Quinn, Robin/Kevin, Robin/Nick, Ted/Zoey, Ted/Jeanette, Ted/Victoria, Lily/Dawson OC, Barney/Robin

* * *

[ Year one - November 11th, 2011 ] Prequel

* * *

She left him speechless. She left him quivering for more as he kept looking at her. This girl just didn't look at him the same way he felt for her. He wasn't the guy to fall for a girl, even this girl. Marshall's wife. Ex-wife. Marshall passed away shortly a year ago, and from there, Barney had this feelings he couldn't understand. He tried so much to understand, but really couldn't. Not a lot of people understood that he could fall in love. They all thought he was one of those guys that just leave girls, and never call them again. Sure, he is that person, but whenever he looks at Lily, he feels so much better, making his heart just feel all weird. His heart bursts whenever she looks at him, touching his fingers by accident.

He wasn't supposed to fall for this girl though. It was against the bro code, even if his best friend has passed. He broke it so many times before. Once or twice with Ted, and now with Marshall, but he couldn't help himself on what he should feel like. She was Red. Making his heart burst more and more. She just impacted his life, but the only he wished that could happen was how the girl looked at him. He wished the same way Ted looks at Robin, feeling so much love just lurking through his body. He wish he could steal something for the girl, probably. He just needed to see if the girl felt the same with him, and just go on from there. This is his journey on how the robot fell in love with the kindergarten teacher, and it was legendary.

* * *

Barney was in his ordinary suit, in the ordinary booth he sat in with the gang. Ted sat on the other side of him. Robin and Lily were out shopping, leaving the boys just drinking down the alcohol they've been sucking down for the past hour. Usually, Barney could be going on and on about the girls that rattled through the bar, while Ted usually talked about his job, or even his life with his new girlfriend he stashed up the day before, thinking it's the one. Just normal stuff, but today was different. Barney was quite. Ted was sucking down way too much alcohol. They just didn't talk like usual. Maybe that's because Barney was thinking about Lily. Her images showed up in his mind, wandering up and down his body. It felt amazing, but too bad he couldn't talk about how much he's falling for the girl. Ted would just attack him because she was Marshall's lady, not his, but Marshall died a year ago due to his heart acting up. He knew he was going to die, so nothing surprised them, but at the same time, it was really painful to watch their close friend just leave them.

None of them wanted that. Not even Lily. Barney was there, calming her down. Robin tried, but of course, she failed. Ted was in charge of the whole food problem, but Barney was there with the whole surviving the problem. Barney was devastated, of course, that was one of his friends. Things happen after having too much contact with each other. Three months later, they were already pressing their lips against each other, feeling each other's warmth. So many times did Barney apologized to Marshall, but he felt so much guilt. It wasn't guilt though. It was a few more steps in becoming attached to the red head. Little did he know that he was going to fall in love with her slowly, developing chunks of chemistry? She always talked about chemistry. She kind of gave the advice to Robin when she was kind of in love with Barney, but sadly, he was going after Nora at the time. Thank god, Robin left the Barney world, and kind of arrived to the Ted world. Surprisingly, they haven't gotten to the dating path yet. They are out of their minds.

Again, the two just didn't talk, not until the two girls arrived with hands full of shopping bags. Barney smiled immediately when he saw the red head sit down, talking right back at Robin who sat right next to Ted. Barney was imagining her again and again. Naked… Clothed… Anything. It was always her on his mind. He was in the middle of thinking about her once again until he felt the girl's elbow hit his ribs. He cried out, finding his hand just run the side of his body, "What was that for?" He asked, still rubbing it. "What's wrong with you?" She asked, keeping her eyes just upon him. He didn't feel like answering. He didn't even feel like talking for that matter, today is weird. This is the day where they had the challenge of sleeping together. Lily probably didn't remember, but Barney has it stuck in his mind 24/7. Normally, he doesn't quite remember his days whenever he slept with a random girl, but this girl wasn't random. This is his best friend. The girl that makes him melt inside. His happiness could be with her. If it wasn't Robin, then it was her, but too bad, she didn't see the same way. She hardly talks about the night, and hardly does she talk about the days he was there, making her feel alive, but again, little did he knew that in a week things will be different with them. They will be making out, feeling the warmth one of them have been hoping to feel for the last year since they last done it.

"There's nothing wrong with me." He declared, eyes streaming over to his scotch glass filled with the liquid if he had enough of he could just pass out. He wanted that. He hated feeling all this love. He loves the girl, and again, the only thing that bothered him was that she didn't feel the same way. Robin once told him that timing was the key to everything, and chemistry was always the top of everything. Robin told him wise words when they were together, but Robin wasn't Lily. Everything was different when it came to Lily. She was the cutest little bubble he could ever ask for.

"What were you guys talking about before we walked in?" Lily's eyes disappeared from Barney's neck, looking right over at Ted, who was picking at his food that was on his plate for the past hour.

"We didn't talk." Barney answered before Ted could ever have a chance to talk. He straighten up his tie, drinking the last tap of the scotch, drowning all his feelings into one bottle.

Lily rolled her eyes, "Alright, thanks Ted."

Barney nodded his head, walking towards the door, feeling so much pressure just run through in his body. He felt sick to his stomach, he didn't mean to be such an asshole to the girl he loves. It just happened. He walked out the door, leaving them all speechless, and questioning his matter.

"Whoa—What's wrong with him?" Robin asked, sipping down the beer bottle.

"I don't know, I wanted to talk to him, but nothing happened." Ted finally opened up his mouth.

Lily ignored every word they had to say, she knew what was wrong with him. She tried to hide the fact, and tried to act cool around Barney, but maybe her questions were a little bit too much. She slept with him a year ago, and to her, she felt like she was on cloud nine. Again, she's one of those girls that hid the fact she actually loved sleeping with Barney Stinson, but she couldn't say for sure if she had feelings for him. Marshall died not too long ago, she just can't herself falling for another guy. Lily left Robin and Ted alone, and they both had questions filling their brains, but didn't exactly come out.

"Hey, Ted, why aren't you eating?" Robin asked.

"Not that hungry. I've been kind of busy with the whole GNB building production. Too stressing." Ted titled his head, eyeing his food, playing it with his fork.

"Ah, Schmosby, my little Teddy bear." She giggled, placing a soft kiss on his lips.

"Robin… What are we doing?" He asked this time.

"What do you mean?"

"We're sneaking around. I don't know, but maybe we should be a title on this."

She sighed, "You want to put a title on our so called relationship?"

"Yeah. Of course I do, I love you." He places a soft kiss on her lips.

"I love you too, and yeah, soon, we'll put a title on it."

* * *

Upstairs, Barney was left picking up every rose petal he laid out for the both of them, he did it in a soft, but sad way. He was sad that she didn't even look at him all that much, her eyes were on his neck, not his eyes. This is what he gets for having strong feelings for Lily.

"What is this?" Lily asked, focusing on the huge romantic shit that was all over her room.

Barney didn't have the strength to look away, he just sat on the bed, looking at the lonely rose petal he left on the floor. She likes me not was running through his head. "For Robin." He was a good liar.

Lily sighed, "Too bad Robin doesn't live here anymore. It's me, Barney. Just me." She was right, that lie was a bit bad.

"Ted then."

"Ted's room is across the hall. You know that."

He jumped from the bed, looking her in the eye finally after all night avoiding those beautiful eyes that leave him breathless, "Then what do you want me to say, huh? That I did this all for you, or that I did this so I can sleep with you again? I don't want that." He really didn't. He just wanted to kiss her, thinking she's all his. His hands just wander up and down her skin, feeling how perfect she felt against his skin.

Lily didn't say anything, she really didn't want to hear it. She hated seeing how much Barney can do to try and sleep with a girl. The girl was her. She was his best friend, and he's acting like this towards her?

Barney didn't want to sleep with her. He wanted to make love to her. There's a big difference.

"Just get out. Please, I don't think I can see you right now." Her head turned swiftly to the side, her eyes not looking at the beautiful blonde man that was standing right there, having fear in his eyes.

"You think I'm just doing this to get in your pants, huh?" He asked, nodding his head.

"You do all kinds of things, so yeah, of course you would do this. I know you."

"Not enough then." He flashed her a look, throwing the last rose pedal in the bag before he stormed out of the room.

Lily really did feel bad, "Fuck. Marshall, what should I do?"

* * *

That night Barney and Lily didn't sleep all that well. They kept turning, getting all uncomfortable. Both of them didn't have someone to spoon with, so they just left their little eyes just flash to the ceiling, thinking about each other.

Barney was thinking about Lily.

Lily was thinking about Barney.

It played out perfectly, but Lily was too stubborn to notice that Barney night actually have feelings. Like legit feelings. The feeling he probably felt with Robin. The big sparks whenever that girl shows up in his dreams, or in reality. That was love.

* * *

Year one - November 12th, 2011

* * *

"What the heck is wrong with you, Barney? Lately, you've been acting way too down. I haven't watched you pick a girl up in a year here. Are you doing it in secret?" Ted asked, cupping his hands together.

Ted hasn't been himself lately either. It might be towards how his secret relationship with Robin has been playing out. Robin doesn't want to announce it, while Ted really does want to announce it. It's just like how timing was awful for the two. Ted is coming to the conclusion that maybe they really aren't meant to be. It was the obvious, afterall.

"What are you talking about, Ted? I'm awesome, and you got me. I wait until you guys wash up to the apartment while I get ready to do something out of the playbook. It's always legen- wait for it- dary." Barney chuckled at his own joke. Typical.

He's back on legendary again. Beautiful. He hasn't really used that word in quite a while, and now that he is doing it, Ted knew for sure he's fine. He's always going to be the Barney Stinson he once knew.

Robin came walking in the bar with a leather pants and jacket, her hair in the most perfect way possible, "Hey guys. Have you seen Lily? I've been trying to contact her all damn day."

Ted's eyes widen at the sight, "What are you wearing?"

"Can I not wear this?"

"I didn't say that. I'm just asking how you can wear that. It's one hundred degrees outside, or it feels like it."

"It's kind of cold, Ted. Have you been outside—"

Before Robin could finish her sentence, Barney right away notice what was going on. Like always, "Whoa, whoa whoa. WHOA. You guys are dating, aren't you?"

Robin quickly denied it, while Ted just kept his mouth shut.

It was one of those things that annoyed Ted, "We're not meant to be, so yeah, no. We're not together." He got out of the booth, walking towards the door.

"I'll be right back…" Robin announced to Barney.

"Ted- Stop it."

"What do you want from me, Robin? I think you're the only one that doesn't want to announce to the world that we're together, but we are… Well I thought we were. I don't get it."

"I don't want Barney to know our lives."

"It's all about Barney, isn't it?"

"No… Please, stop. Barney isn't in my life like that anymore. He's too hung up on a slut anyway, probably. You're the only guy I want to be with, but I'm too scared to announce that. I'm just too scared to be in a relationship that didn't work out in the first place. I love you, Ted, so much, but you know, I'm Robin Scherbatsky. I'm never going to change."

Ted took both of his palms, planting straight on her sweet cheeks, "I love you."

Robin started to have blood flush to her cheeks, "Always."

He kissed the top of her forehead, "We can try and make this work." They didn't try hard enough, but we'll find out later.

* * *

Later that night, Barney stayed at the bar later than expected, sipping down scotch. He didn't bother to sleep with anyone that night, or the nights before this night. He couldn't find himself sleeping with someone else that wasn't was Lily. He loves the girl more than he loves himself, and that's saying something, but too bad he couldn't help but realize that she's not the girl for him. She's always going to be Marshall's, even if he died with courage. What did Barney do in his life to make people realize he's nothing more than just a broken toy, wanting someone to love on. Someday he's going to realize there are other girls out there.

Lily walked up to him, siting across from him in the booth, "Hey."

"Hey."

"I'm sorry about last night. I know that was inappropriate. I should of never said anything, really."

"It's no biggie. Things happen, and if you think I'm the biggest whore on this planet, then that shall happen."

"I didn't mean to say that. You know I didn't mean any word of that. It's just been hard without Marshall around."

"But yet you had the strength to sleep with me a year ago."

"Which I regret."

"I don't-" He paused himself, biting down on his lower lip, "I would never regret something so beautiful. Besides, we did something amazing, too bad we didn't get the chance to find out what it could of changed into. It could of been something more, but like you said before, I don't do love. Robin was the only girl I've ever had the chance to lurk into as an awesome man, and now she's skipping off to Ted, who is the love of her life. I want something like that someday, surprisingly, but again, I'm not okay to be in a relationship. Never was. The only good thing I have to do is just let you go."

He really did have feelings for her.

She feels sick to her stomach, like someone stabbed her twenty million times. She needed to say something, but she nodded in agreement, "It's for the best."

Again, little did they know they would be making out with each other the next following weekend.

"You're the best." Barney said, sipping down his drink faster than he could say anything else.

* * *

Year one - November 13th, 2011

* * *

All night Robin was slipped into Ted's arm. Everything about him made her feel so alive, even when he holds her in the right places. His warmth just making her feel safe, and calm. She has missed this feeling. This is something she begged for quite a while now, and now it's happening, she swore she could hear her own heart beating in a peaceful way. Such a paradise she's in.

She placed a sweet little kiss on his lips, "Baby, last night was amazing."

He woke up instantly, a smile curving on the side of his face, "I really know how to make things not awkward."

She giggled, "You really are amazing."

She places one more kiss on his lips, longer than the last time. Ted's hand wandered up to her cheek, stroking it softly, "What should we do today? I was kind of thinking about grading some papers, but since you're off today, I'd like to do anything with you. Romantic wise, or just sex wise." He winked at his so called girlfriend, and the only thing he felt was her lips against his, her hand just gently rested on his chest.

"If that's what you want." Robin said softly.

"Of course. I love you, Robin." He said it really confident, and before his lips were almost attached to hers once again, Lily comes barging in.

"Holy shit, of course you guys are together again, but Robin, I think to talk to you about something really personal." She started to pick at her fingers.

"Yeah, of course, I'll get ready right away."

Lily walks away in her room.

Robin's eyes switched back to Ted's, "Grade those papers, then we'll do something tomorrow or sometime tonight." She pecked his lips, throwing on some clothes.

"I better plan something then."

"Be careful, big boy. Don't get all horny now." She giggled, attacking his lips once again. She could never get tired of those lips aground hers, making her feel safe.

* * *

Robin had to push herself off of him just to walk in Lily's room, then right away, she saw the tears just tumble to the ground from the red head's gentle face, "Lily?"

Lily quickly wiped them away, "I thought I had a chance to cry for just a tiny bit before Ted could let you go, but I guess not- I do know you hate tears, so I'll stop crying."

"Why are you crying anyway?" Robin asked, sitting herself down so her free hand was on Lily's back.

"I miss Marshall, so much."

"We all do. He was a really good guy. I know how much he made you happy, and I also know he would be happy if you got yourself out there. You deserve to be happy."

"I know that, but what if I already found that guy- and I'm just too scared to commit to him, because of the things he did in the past?"

"It kind of matters on how you feel about him, but if you're too scared, then why don't you find some reason to trust the guy. Make him a test or something, but can I ask who this lucky man is?"

"You're going to kill me, but Barney?"

"Yeah, defintely give him a test. Maybe Ted will make a Lily 101." She chuckled, but Lily was amused.

"I'm serious. I haven't told you this, but urm, we slept together a year ago, and ever since, I've been too scared to note that I have feelings for the man. Which I do. A tiny bit. I saw him here yesterday, picking up every rose pedal he laid out for our one year anniversary of actually sleeping together. I was kind of being rude because really, I thought he wanted just sex. I saw him the next night, drinking down so much scotch he could even handle, and he told me he had to let go..." She broke down right there, her place just planted in Robin's lap, "I didn't realize that I had feelings until last night. I feel so horrible, because I can't have him.

"You have feelings for Barney?"

"Maybe?"

Robin sighs, "I guess let him go too."

"I'll just have to do that, but are you mad?"

"I'm not mad. Barney and I are in the past. Ted and I are kind of taking things slow. I've been such a horrible to him, anyway, so I need to take things slow. With the man that could do anything for me if he could. I love him, and the love I'm feeling for him is just strong, and witty. It's perfect." She smiled at her own words, "Let go of Barney, because honey, he's not worth the pain."

He really was though. Lily will find out sooner than later.

* * *

Year one - November 19th, 2011

* * *

It happened so fast.

The only thing Lily could even remember from that night was that Barney and her were laughing in the bar, then the next they were making out upstairs, in her bed, where they did it the last time. The first second she thought, she couldn't believe this was happening. She swore to herself she wouldn't wash up back in the Stinson train, but now, everything is turned to shit, but the lips against hers was amazing. She can't believe this is happening right now, she's been wanting it more and more every time Barney looked at her, or even smiled for that matter. She also swore to herself that she doesn't want to get wined up in something she doesn't think will last, but the way their lips were attacking each other said otherwise.

When their lips finally departed, Lily's heart was beating way too fast. He might of caught a glimpse of her wanting more and more, the faces she was making was obvious. The more they leaned in for more, she felt perfectly fine with everything, and again, boom, their lips were at it again. In a slow, tentative way.

The door sprung open, and Barney's suit jacket is already half way off, and now, Lily had her legs around the blonde guy's body, which had perfect all over it. All of their clothes joined in a clothing pile that was across the room, chanting at them. Their mouths finally stopped, watching the unclothing just happen. Lily threw down her bra, revealing just the perfect pair of twins Barney ever seen. Barney helped with her pants, but it wasn't easy for him. It should be easy, but it wasn't. This was Lily, not just some random girl he picked up at the bar. This is his best friend, the girl that makes him just float to heaven. His hands were shaking.

His hands to Lily thought, it felt perfect. Heaven. Whatever you want to describe it. It was just ideal. He brushed them along side of her swell breasts, trying to get the dang pants off, and when it was officially off, he couldn't help himself but kiss the tips of her nipples, making her whimper.

Her hands were amazing too, they officially got his dang pants off, including the belt. They were halfway there, just mounting each other by the wonderful kisses they were doing to each other's skin. Everything felt so right now, even if this is the second time they've done this.

His fingers slipped inside of her panties, taking his time was he wandered in a peaceful way, tickling her. Making her goosebumps just go crazy. Then Lily's fingers got all caught up in Barney's hair. His hair was smooth, able to get in and out, just roaming around, she did that so many times when he finally slipped a finger inside of her tight entrance. It's been a year since she had sex, of course it would be tight, and that's how Barney likes it. Tight, and he loved the idea that it was Lily who could feel his fingers just rub against her.

She whimpered, "Barney... Please, stop teasing."

He chuckled, kissing her lips once again, "I like it though."

"I... D-Don't, please never stop." She finally came to her senses.

His lips wandered down from her little lips, then her jawline where she just whimpered more and more at how good it felt to have his lips everywhere he could get his hands on. He did love to multitask. He had his finger right inside of her, making her feel so good, while kissing her neck.

"Never stop." She once again said.

Minutes passed, and Lily manage to get Barney's member out in the open, and Barney laid her down, kissing her lips once again

"Barney... Barney, now, please." She begged.

And that's where he plugged her, deep. Making himself at home, and before the friction started to light up, she gasps, and sucks in the air as she gets ready to feel the moving from Barney. Neither of them took their eyes off each other, he just moved in a peaceful way, basically making love to her.

He moves more and more, and every time he did, a little ghost smile washed up on her face. They both felt the electric spark just sprung from their bodies, into the open, and that's where Lily was the one to kiss him, biting down on his lower lip. A smirk showed up on his face, and just kissed her in a passionate way.

And that's where Barney and Lily realized that they were perfect for each other, but stubbornness ran through their body, telling them not to go through it. It takes more and more time before they can realize they are meant to be.

* * *

Lily doesn't know what she did here. She sat laid in her bed, covering up her body, as she started at the ceiling while she heard little snores come from Barney, who just been very great towards her lately. Reasons why the alcohol told her to sleep with him.

"Did this mean anything?" She asked, knowing Barney would be the one to wake up.

"Mommy... what?"

Lily hit him on the head, "Did this mean anything to you?"

"Whaat... Yeah, of course it did."

"But you told me you'd let me go."

"I guess it didn't work out."

"This didn't mean anything. You've done this with a lot of girls, and of course, it didn't mean anything towards them."

"You're different though."

"How different?"

"You're Lily." He said, smiling.

"I'm Lily, yeah, I understand that, but you're Barney. You've done so many weird things with other girls."

"Are you jealous?"

"Not really."

"You're jealous of those other girls."

"Maybe."

Barney chuckled, pushing his lips against hers, "You're the only other girl I've ever had feelings with."

"What about Robin?"

"I loved her, but I love you way more."

"So, you're not upset over the fact she's back on Ted?"

"Of course not, Teddy boy deserves a girl in his life, and I'm happy it's Robin. She's a wonderful girl, and she's just the only girl that made him feel alive. That's all that matters, right?"

"I felt like that towards Marshall."

"I know, I know."

"I know he would be pissed at you for stealing me."

"I didn't steal you though, you just went along with the kidnapping."

Lily started to laugh, "I guess you're right."

* * *

At the bar, Robin and Ted sat across from each other.

"I've always wanted to ask this, Ted, but I didn't get the time to ask it because it seems kind of weird coming from me."

"Shoot at me then."

"Well... This is stupid, but why do you even love me?"

So many answers ran through his head, but he only had one chance at this. Making sure it was perfect for the both of them. He remembers when the first time he saw that face look at him, the smile peeking on the side of her face as he did the same. Again, they are always going to compare it to a movie kind of way. The boy sees a girl, they fall in love, and it's perfect from there, but things turned to shit when they started to enter the love world. Timing. He went to a wedding, and that is where he saw Victoria. He started to like her, and at the same time, Robin came to her senses and told herself she was now in love with Ted. He was going after someone else, while Robin hid her feelings. Timing was a bitch to them. It was great when the summer started to roll in, they found what they've been hiding for months in advance. Ted kissed Robin, and she kissed him back. Started the best year of their lives. Well, if you don't count Lily leaving Marshall for some art class, but other than that, they actually loved each other then. They kept that love blooming by every bump they drove over, and every little fight they've ever done. They tried to move in with each other, making that turn into shit, but the love they held for each other stayed in. Making them love each other more and more, until the day came when they realized that they need to stop doing whatever their doing. They couldn't agree on everything, and their answers were always different. She wanted to live in Argentina, while he wanted to have kids, and get married on the spot. Robin's answers were way different, and then, they decided to leave everything in the past, and continue their weird friendship that was still there. The blue french horn was still in the fingers of Ted. It rested in his room, in a secret place, because one day, he had hope they are going to get back together, and be happy once again, but this time around, it didn't feel right. Its supposed to be easy, but with Robin, everything is weird, and hard. She didn't want to tell anyone, while at the same time, probably deep down, she wanted to say I love you so many times. Ted wanted to open up to her. To make her feel that she was going to be okay with him. The blue french horn still had a way around them, but again, it felt weird. Did this girl even love him back?

"I have many answers to prove to myself that I'm in love with Robin Scherbatsky, but it would take years to tell you because I have so many reasons. I love you, because you're just Robin. You're not perfect, nor do you describe yourself as perfect. You're just Robin..."

"I can't have kids."

Ted's mouth slightly opened up, "I know. You don't want kids..."

"No, I can't have kids. I went to the doctor yesterday, and they told me I can't have kids. I thought I had a baby stuffed inside of me, but no, it was the sign from the universe that I really shouldn't rely on love to help me through live, and just live my life as a news reporter at WWN. I can't keep relying on myself that someday I'm going to have kids, and basically marriage running through my veins, because Ted, that's not going to be me. I love you, I really do, but I can't keep relying myself on you Ted. To this day, my answers are always going to be different.."

"You're breaking up with me, aren't you?"

"Yeah... I need to focus on myself."

"I get it. You're in love with Barney."

"Maybe I do. Maybe I don't, but I wouldn't go after him if I said I had to focus on myself."

"Right. Of course... I'm gonna go. Have a nice drink, Scherbatsky." And that's where Ted faded in the New York sky, the coldness just hitting his chin as he kept hi arms around himself, trying to get all warm until he saw her again. The girl that was married once. Divorced the next day. He fell too hard for that girl, and now, it's weird seeing her. Her beauty just spilling through the air. He told himself that he let her go, but when his eyes launched back at her, it felt like he's back into place. The way he was back then.

"Zoey?"

Zoey looked back at him, trying not to suffer from smiling, "Ted."

"Hi..." Ted couldn't say anything else, but the smiling he was doing, he made sure words will tumble out of his mouth sooner than later.

* * *

"It's not gonna happen, is it?" Barney asked.

"...I'm sorry." Lily said right back.

Barney tried to smile, but really couldn't, so his arm was wrapped around the little red head, "At least we had one more journey down the thing w've been thinking about for the longest time."

Lily laughed, "Exactly. I think we're better as friends. Friends who had sexual activities with each other, but I doubt anyone is going to know about it. I guess we both need to keep our mouths shut."

He nodded his head in agreement, "I live on lies, so that's going to happen."

And that's where they just cuddled with each other, falling asleep in each other's arms.

* * *

Robin walked inside of her apartment, her feet dragging against the ground. Why the heck would Ted just leave like, even when she told him the worst news any girl would receive. He's better than that. He's usually not like this. It makes her think, why now? Why not in the future? She didn't need a boyfriend. She just needed a friend, being there for her. It made her sick to her stomach when she thought about it more and more. Maybe Ted wasn't a good friend after all, or even a real one. She didn't know what to think, or say. It's still difficult for the words wrapping around her head, saying 'you can't have a kid.' Maybe when she settled down with the right guy, she would of wanted a kid. Now, things seems fucked up.

Then in the distance, Ted stood there, eyes sinking inside of her soul.

"What are you doing here, Ted?" Robin asked, her fingers getting all tangled up in her hair.

She looked like a wreck.

"Did you really think I would run off like that, Robin?"

"Yeah... Probably, everyone runs off from me."

"I wouldn't. Robin, you're my best friend. So what if we can't work things out as a couple. Our friendship was the only thing hanging on the right side of the hook. We'll always be great as friends, and that's actually pretty amazing. I love you, Robin. Always have, and probably always will, but if you need a friend by your side, I'm here. I won't leave you like I did at the bar.."

Robin's tears became irresistible. She ran into his arms, and the way his arms felt around her body, it made her feel safe. Another stubborn couple wanting something more, but nothing comes out of their mouths, only being stuck to their lips.

"I love you, Ted. So much."

Ted kissed the top of her head, and that night, he didn't leave her sight. He was there, holding her in his arms. Kissing every part of her head that felt the pain. He's in love with this girl, but if they can't develop a relationship right now, sometimes there's a future to hold that part with them. He's going to try harder, letting her know that he's going to be there for her, no matter what happens. It's going to be amazing.

* * *

Year one - December 24th, 2011

* * *

It's now Christmas eve. The gang sitting in their usual spot at the bar, rubbing elbows against each other as they argued about something totally absurd, like usual. It's just one of those usual days, until Ted had to open his mouth, declaring that Zoey and him met up weeks ago, the night where Robin told him he can't have kids. It's been a month since they broke up whatever they were happening, so yeah, drama was set on this day. All night long, and probably starting tomorrow.

"Zoey and I found each other again - And look at that, here she is." Ted said, lips connecting against Zoey's lips. She offered back the kiss, and sat down in the chair that sat on the edge of the table.

Robin felt like something punched her in the face. Hard. Straight in the gut, and face. Seems like her journey down the hockey lane just came up instantly, letting all the bruises hang on her body. She really made sure it wasn't obvious, but Barney, the only guy that knows her enough to know that seeing Ted with another girl, not even two months later after they broke up. She just sipped down her drink, eyes switching on the other side of the table so she couldn't witness the worst thing any person can witness.

Barney kept his eyes on her, switching back to Ted whenever he looked at him, talking about his stupid relationship with the girl that went after him with his GNB building. He couldn't believe Ted would actually do this to Robin. Lily had the same idea. So Barney and her, chatted about it through text.

 _Barney: do you see robin?_

 _Lily: yeah, ted is an asshole._

 _Barney: why the heck would he do this to her?_

 _Lily: he should of took some time before he came after the only girl that was pretty evil in the relationship._

 _Barney: both of them are quite evil. now._

 _Lily: should we say something to ted, or robin?_

 _Barney: robin of course._

They switched their phones off, smiling at each other, but their attention went right back on Ted.

Back to Robin. All she's doing is absorbing the pain, letting it run through her veins. She really did feel sick. She caught another glimpse of Ted, and looked how happy he was talking about the familiar joke she heard not too long ago. Then time passed, and she swore she saw Ted just look right back at her, trying to keep on smiling, but really couldn't keep it. Ted really hated seeing Robin cry, or see her sad because he never implied to make her upset. He hated that. So much.

Barney and Lily of course tried to keep their eyes to themselves, but they were choked up on how things turned out for their two fellow friends. They've known for a long time that Ted loves Robin more than anything, and him breaking her heart has to have a good reason. Ted is one of the few people that doesn't just go break up with a girl without a good reason.

* * *

As time flew by, Ted's new girlfriend came back and forth from the apartment as the gang tried to enjoy themselves. Robin for one wasn't really impress with the whole thing as Ted was. He just kept laughing, and smiling as the other half of the gang shared looks, then right back to Robin who tried to be okay with the whole thing. Barney clearly wanted to say something, but he knew Robin would hate to get her feelings right out.

Robin stood up, "I'm going to go. I have… Stuff to do." She quickly said, walking herself to the door as she tried to keep her tears under control, but the moment her whole body ran out of the room she just broke down, harder than expected. Her whole body fell to the floor.

She didn't realize Ted opened the door right after, witnessing it. He bit down on his lip, closing his eyes as his body fell to the ground, letting his back hit the wall, his eyes not leaving her sight. Robin didn't say anything, she didn't need to. She felt his presence though, it felt like fireworks were splashing in her body. She loves him, and she knew that he loves her too, but why are they too stubborn to get back together? They're them, of course.

"Look I…" Robin cut him off, giving him one of those 'shut the fuck up' looks.

"You didn't even wait a second before you jumped on another girl. It hurt me, Ted. You didn't realize it until this moment which is just so stupid. You're so stupid to not know I was hurting. You're supposed to know… You're my best friend, and I'm in love with you. I thought you loved me too, but you're too attached to that girl in there. Great. Another tightrope we're hanging on, huh?" Robin replied, her fists getting bundled up together. Her body becoming this hot pad. Her eyes didn't feel like meeting with his, she's too much in the moment, and if she saw his face, he'd probably have a black eye in the morning.

Ted though just didn't answer. He's too much in a shock moment to say anything. He didn't want to be the one to start things, but clearly that become the problem. He loves Robin more than he could ever imagine he'd love a person, but Zoey. Robin. Zoey. Those are the two names that were spilling through his head, and then Barney's name was rubbing against his ribs, bruising his whole entire body over the sour thought that Barney might still be in love with her, or Robin might still be in love with him. Or both. It made his stomach turn into knots and getting in a relationship with her again just seemed wrong. So wrong. He just left her there, crying on the ground. He felt horrible about it, but it needed to be done. He might of lost his best friend because of his stupid actions.


	2. 01 - Flooding Thoughts

Eight months later everyone seemed to have a lovely time together. They hung out more, and no drama came forward. Well behind the scenes all the drama unfolded, but in public, it seemed like a normal day. Robin rarely comes around, she's either 'busy' with Canadian things as she states that, or she's working.

Speaking of Ted and Robin, they're not okay. They haven't had a normal conversation in a while, and it's been worrying Ted. Zoey and him are fine, they've been perfect together but somehow the idea of not talking to Robin just makes him feel sick to his stomach. These weird feelings have been running through his system, unable to unchain to his heart, but he needs to focus on his life with Zoey. He needs to stop worrying what Robin is wearing, or if she's smiling, or even if she's seeing anyone. He needs to focus on his girlfriend, who he feels like he needs to marry her. Yeah things are getting too good for those two. Sure he might still be in love with Robin, he never had his feelings just fly away, but he loves Zoey too. He's really that in love. He's not even joking. He may be the person that just falls in love with someone quickly, and sudden. Go back to the night where Robin and him were having their first date, and then boom, he dropped the 'L' word on her. He felt embarrassed, and his words always charmed his ass right off. That's why they fell in love. Robin fell in love with a guy that embarrassed himself in the worst possible moments, and charmed his way out of the rough patches. He's a nerd.

Barney sat across from Lily, a smile peeking on his lips as he noticed she's been happy. She's been smiling more. She's been getting out more, other than coming to this bar. She's just been happy, and Barney loves seeing a happy Lily. "You've been peachy." He said, sipping down his drink as he straighten out his tie.

Lily laughed. That laugh of hers was coming back. Barney was still in love with her, and it's impossible for him not to think about her. They haven't kissed since the night they called it quits. They've only been hanging out. As friends. Lily thought it was a good idea to hook Barney up with the bar sluts. Sure, he goes with them, probably kisses a few on the lips, but he hasn't had sex in a long time. The last time was with Robin when she was down, and scared from what Ted was doing to her, but other than that? He was clean. He was in love with Lily Aldrin. "Dawson and I have big plans tonight."

When she talked about Dawson, a feeling ran through his body. It was jealously. It stung like a bitch, for sure. He just continued to swirl his drink, nodding his head up and down. Dawson was her new so called boyfriend. He's very attractive, and he can really bring charm to this bar. Barney could see it, and plus, he's this some kind of war hero or something like that. That's always a plus. Barney hasn't even done a play like that, and he's sure not going to try. He's only tried the whole airman thing. That's always hot, right? Okay, yeah. This Dawson thing was really bothering him. He was biting the back of his cheek because of it. "That's great, Lil. You deserve it." And then he smiled, his eyes flashing to the table. Seeing crushed peanuts scattered everywhere, a few drops of alcohol splattered. His eyes were just watching it, like it's going to move or something like that. Lily didn't even notice it. That even bothered him.

She just smiled, eyes just catching everyone that was walking in. She was waiting for someone. It was pretty obvious. If Dawson was going to show up, Barney was probably going to go out the back door, and just throw some TV or something like that. He wasn't in the mood to talk with him. He'll just talk about how cool he is by saving people. He'd probably have his suit on, and of course he'd probably be touching Lily romantically as Barney sits across from them. His hand started to twitch, and from that he was about to get up and walk away, but Ted sat down immediately, picking at a few more peanuts. "So, Dawson..." Ted raised his eyebrows at Lily, a smile wrapping around his lips. He's smiling like talking about Dawson was the coolest thing ever. It made Barney sick. "Is he coming?" And that question made Lily's eyes switch back at Barney, then on Ted. "Yeah, I hope so. You'll like him."

Barney frowned, laying back in the booth as his eyes didn't look at Lily like he wanted to. It was like she liked seeing him in pain. Pain. Doubt. Barney Stinson was in a pain for being in love with Lily Aldrin. This wasn't like him. He should be sleeping with some stranger, but he couldn't pull himself to do it. This was probably the first time where he felt numb, and Lily can't even see it. "I really hope so." Barney said, a fake smile strangling his lips, his eyes carefully looking at Lily's sweet lips. They looked so pure, and kissable. He fingertips were getting in the action as they were pressed against the scotch glass, and seeing her smile only made him fear that he lost her to a guy none of them knew.

Lily knew that introducing a guy to the gang was only the start. Ted knew that one for sure as he always introduces the so called love of his life to everyone. There will always be judging involved. Barney was great at that, well of course when it comes to Ted and his dreams. He tells Ted that the girl has to have a great rack, and a great behind. With those perfect little things, he knows for sure Ted found the one- Though none of that has happened since the guy hasn't even been married, and Barney gets sick and tired of how Ted talks about love, because Barney was pretty much the only guy in the world that hasn't experienced it really. Robin was different though. His love for her was so strong, and just raw. Them breaking up was probably for the best, and without them breaking up, who knows what Ted would be doing right now other than dating someone that isn't Robin. With Marshall gone, Barney was the only guy that would give Ted some feedback on how he's doing in a relationship. Mosby was always great. He was just a hopeless romantic, and all that jazz right on top of it. Any girl would be dying to be with him, but that was the problem. Robin Scherbatsky loved him, and the only thing he was doing was breaking her heart some more. Robin hasn't even been seen really since she saw Zoey with him. Barney really doesn't like her. The taste of her was just daunting, and he has been talking to his best friend about it. He surely doesn't even listen, even to the things that was right. It doesn't mean Ted doesn't feel bad about the whole Robin thing. She was the one that didn't want to put a dang title on them, and from that, she felt like she needed a little time for herself. It's been eight months. Eight months that were the nightmare for all of them except Lily and Ted, who was happy in their relationship. Barney and Robin, of course, were broken. Like a child's toy.

"Oh my god, there he is!" Lily's smile sparkled, and Barney's head turned the direction to the solider. Oh god, he was wearing his outfit and everything. Barney started to chew on his lip, eyebrows narrowing down as he looked away. He wasn't really paying attention right now as Ted noticed everything. Ted, from there, found out that Barney Stinson was in love with Lily Aldrin, or he was just finding out that he was gay. One of them was brutally true. Barney was in love with Lily, and the love was just so eager. Dawson walked over to the booth, arms wrapping around Lily's waist as he lips captured her cheek. Her hands were on his cheeks, her smile not even leaving her lips. They both fell back in the booth, her arm wrapped around his as they looked at both Barney and Ted. "This is Dawson." Lily commented, as Dawson waved. Barney didn't say anything. He just looked at Dawson with his judging eyes, his head shaking back and forth. "Um, sorry. I have to go." He said softly, his eyes not looking at Lily. He was only looking at the solider. He could see that he was quite handsome, and any girl would die to be with him. That feeling only made him be left in the cold. He got up from the booth, slipping a five down on the table before he walked away so peacefully. Lily looked at him leaving, her heart started to sink, but she wasn't in the mood to go up and talk to him, so her eyes just switched back at Ted as they continued to talk. Ted's eyes didn't leave Barney, realizing that Barney was much in love with Lily.

* * *

Barney opened the bar door, feeling the New York weather just flood to his cheeks. His head was pounding with heat as he kept playing the scene of Lily being happy with someone that's not him. It was playing in his head like a broken record. He just kept on seeing her smile. Her smile was killing him, literally. He knows it's wrong for him to be in love with Lily because of how Marshall called dibs on her way before they met, but he was gone, and he was there for her. At first, way before Marshall was even sick, he had the thought about having sex with the red head. Sexually there when Marshall ever passes away, but he never knew it would be so close, and so fast. Marshall was gone. He's not coming back, and he was there kissing the girl's lips. He'll always remember how soft they were. He'll always remember how her waist felt against his fingertips, and of course he'll always remember that night all together. From that little moment, he can't stop thinking about her. Like when he breathes, he thinks about her. Her smile. Her body. Her eyes. Her hands. Her everything. His mind was all about her. All about Lily Aldrin.

He was sitting on the steps, listening to streets as they rattled with lights, and car horns. That was his favorite thing about this city, it just never slept. The lights downtown were his favorite. It's probably the only place where he can't even think as people pushed each other to get across the street. Thinking was probably one of his least favorite things because he always fills the what if with happiness. What if he never met Lily, or what if he never met the gang altogether? He didn't like the thoughts that ran through his head. It made him numb, and insane.

He felt disconnected from everyone's lives. Ted was off being happy with Zoey. Lily is happy with Dawson, and Robin? He hasn't seen her around here to know. Robin was special to him, more than she probably knows. Friendship wise though. Them breaking up only made him realize that she's his best friend. He needs her in his life, because without her, he doesn't know what he'd be doing right now. Without swaying his lips against hers while listening to Sandcastles in the Sand, he doesn't know for sure what would be happening right now. Would he be in love in with Lily? Would Marshall be dead? Will Ted be dating Zoey? Will Barney even be thinking about this? He just doesn't know.

He was in the void of thinking, and he didn't realize someone sat down right next him. His eyes peeked over at the female, and he breathed in and out when he realized it was Robin. She changed her hair. It was probably a good look for her, and she was wearing a brown coat, her hands inside of the pocket as she smelled the night sky. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be off, probably, ignoring us some more?" Barney asked, his head shaking back and forth. He could see Robin smile, and that smile always punished him, though he didn't love her anymore. He still cared for her. As a friend, he wants to be there for her.

"I should, you're right. I should be ignoring Ted, but I'm sick and tired of running." Her words were harsh, and tender. She wasn't crying, but with her words, she should be. Her smile washed away when she started to talk about Ted. Barney shook his head again, Ted was probably the worst to them both. "I know the feeling."

Robin didn't answer him as she chewed the inside of her cheek. She was hurting. It was obvious. Robin Scherbatsky was actually hurt, and that made Barney furious. "You shouldn't be hurt over what Ted is doing. You should be off being a superstar, because that's what you are. You're a superstar, Scherbatsky," He turned his attention towards her, his leg hitting the step. "Fuck Ted, and his stupid actions. If he has the power to hurt you, then fuck him. He deserves to die in a hole if that's what he's doing right now..." He stopped himself, realizing that he's talking shit about his best friend to his ex girlfriend, but with his upper teeth attacking his lower lip, he just wanted to get it all out. "You should come around more. You shouldn't be sad that your ex boyfriend is having a fun time with his current girlfriend, because damn Robin, we all miss you. I miss you. You're probably the best wing man ever, and I need you around... I need you as my friend."

Robin knew he was right. She should stop being sad over what Ted was doing to her. She was the one that called it quits, and pressured herself to think about herself. Her love for Ted was just too weird, and ill, but that doesn't mean she doesn't think about him, because damn, she thinks about him all the dang time. She thinks about all the good moments because that's all she has. She doesn't have Ted right now, so thinking about him saying 'i love you' on the their first date was the only thing she had right now. Barney was right though, she shouldn't be sad. That's not how Robin Scherbatsky rolls. It was the opposite, "You're in love with Lily."

And yes, he was in love with Lily Aldrin. Both of them were fucked.


End file.
